Stanley Submits a DNA Test to Find His Family 12/6/2020

 Sundays on the Porch with Stanley December 6, 2020

Me: Good morning Stanley! What a beautiful morning this is. The sun is out and smiling big!

Stanley: That’s really a lovely way to put it. I saw you started off your morning right, waking up in the hot tub.

Me: Yes, it is a genuinely nice way to wake up. And then of course, coffee after. <smiling>

Stanley: I heard you talking to someone, but I didn’t see anybody out there with you. Just the voices in your head?

Me: <laughing> No. I always talk with the trees when I’m out here. And I was listening to their stories.

Stanley: The trees? Okay. Yes. I get that. We all talk to the trees too. They really are the foundation of our community. Literally. They provide homes for so many.

Me: That’s true isn’t it. I didn’t think about it, but insects, spiders, birds, squirrels and all the little underground critters probably do call the trees their home. Do you live in a tree too Stanley? Where do you live exactly?

Stanley: Well, mostly during the day I live here on your deck unless I have meeting or a rendezvous with a certain special someone. <wink-wink-grin> But at night, I have a sweet little place down by the creek area. It’s a hollowed-out abode with lots of wet leaves and mold under that big tree that’s decomposing down by the bridge. <grinning>

Me: Oh my. It does sound like a lovely place, for a frog. I’m guessing you have other frog friends, or family, that live in the area too?

Stanley: Well, I like my space, so there are no other frogs close by. There’s a few on the other side of the bridge though. They may be distant cousins or something. I’m really not sure about my family. I sent my spit into one of those DNA places to try to find my ancestors but they didn’t have much to offer.

Me: Oh my! Did you mention that you’re a frog when you filled out the questionnaire?

Stanley: No, they didn’t ask that question.

Me: hmm. That’s interesting.

Stanley: Yes, I’m thinking that too. <starting to chuckle> And, can you imagine the lab conversation that happened when they looked at my spit? They’d know I’m a frog. Right?

Me: <laughing out loud> I would hope so! But who knows? I guess it’s telling that you didn’t receive a report back with info about your ancestors, right?

Stanley: Right. But then how do I find out about my ancestral lineage? I’d like to know where I come from and who my people are.

Me: <Trying not to laugh> Well, that’s a good question. Where would a frog go to find out about his/her ancestors? I’m really not sure. <laughing out loud> I’m sorry Stanley. I’m still back at the idea of you sending your spit out to the DNA people. Oh, to be a fly on the wall in that lab. <Putting my face down in my hands and just letting the laughter come, shoulders shaking, tears running down my face>

Stanley: I can see I need to take this conversation elsewhere. I’m not enjoying this as much as you are.